Manual You Lost Your Marriage Not Your Life, How to Create the Life You Want Your Way

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The very biology of the human body reveals it is natural for a man and a woman God created woman because "it is not good for man to be alone" (Genesis ). We all want and need love. Love of God grows as you mature in life. Loving God means you are both trying to live His way and that you are being fair and.
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How could my husband and I create a happy marriage from the start?

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15 Things You Should Give up to Make Your Marriage Work

How could we survive the first year, and come out happier than we were the day we tied the knot? As the child of a wildly unhappy marriage, lacking in marital role models, I was desperate to figure out how to be a good partner and how to successfully navigate the world as part of a pair, without losing myself in the process.

So, I set out to crowdsource wisdom. For my new book, How to Be Married , I queried hundreds of men and women, from over 20 countries and all walks of life, about what makes a marriage successful. Here are 8 lessons I learned from people around the globe. Create a space where the two of you actually want to spend time together. Danish women taught me how much this matters.

You never want your home to feel like an office or a hotel that the two of you are just passing through. The women I met bought deliciously scented candles and soft blankets by the sackful, and truly embraced the creation of a happy and cozy home where a new couple could get away from the rest of the world. Naturally, this advice came from the French. Avoid the temptation to spend all of your time together in your sweatpants. And this advice goes both ways — your partner should put in an effort to win you over again and again. Follow Motto on Facebook.

Not every day will be perfect, or even good, and that has to be okay. Talk about the imperfections and the pain points. The old adage says marriage is a marathon, not a sprint.

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And some days will feel like an obstacle course where you have to carry your spouse up a mountain and through a pit of mud. Let your spouse take care of you once in a while.


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Women I met in Holland emphasized the importance of this. Complaining about marriage is practically an Olympic sport in America.

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Women all over the world, in literally every country I visited, called out American visitors as some of the worst offenders when it came to complaining about their marriages. Instead, they encouraged me to practice gratitude, being truly thankful for the good things my husband brings to our relationship through regular verbal expressions of thanks. Pay attention to the great things your partner does instead of pointing out the negative.

I f you too are suffering from the marital blues, the good news is that there is plenty you can do to reverse the situation and rediscover some of the youthful vigor that characterised the early days of your relationship. S chuller suggests looking out for tell-tale signs of boredom, such as every night turning into TV night, and spending more time looking at your phone than your partner. Once you've identified the trend, he says the most important thing is acting ASAP. So many times I've worked with couples who say they wish they had gotten support for their relationship sooner or at least had begun to talk about what needed to be talked about.

H ere, the three relationship professionals explain what you can do to help liven up your marriage and avoid becoming one of those depressing statistics According to Stevens, a slackening of action between the sheets is a common indicator of a marriage that has gone off the boil. It keeps you close, intimate and playful. So, if time is the issue, then plan for it. If you can, plan a weekend away.

I t's a cliche that you stop caring about your own appearance as you settle into comfortable marriage — but as with most cliches, there's good reason it exists, according to Schuller. And that, combined with a dull routine and predictable sex life, is disastrous. And, when your partner next makes the effort, let them know how much it means to you, how much you like the way they look and, most importantly, how much you appreciate their effort.

A small compliment goes a long way, believe me. Would you rather leave your job or your spouse? The answer should be obvious — but, says Schuller, couples often go down the wrong path. However, I've lost track of the number of people I meet who have everything on paper, yet are unfulfilled in their lives and relationships. It shouldn't be news by now that happiness is not to be found solely through the acquisition of the materialistic symbols of success.

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What's the point of having it all if you feel alone and disconnected from those you love? Make changes to your work if it leaves no time for play. H owever, routine can also be boring — the sign of marital monotony. Even if this is as simple as cooking a different recipe together or getting a babysitter so you can go to that restaurant you've been talking about for ages.

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Having an event in the diary gives us something to look forward to and something to get excited about. Finding the time and money for a holiday can be tough, but anyone who needs a reason to clock off from work for a long weekend need only look to science.